New Traditions

 My New Year's Eve consisted of being with my husband who was sick with a bad cold and took Nyquil at 9:00 that night and passed out dead asleep by 9:30, and I played Solitare until the sleeping pill kicked in (yes, I am aware that I should be mindful of how much I take it, but I'm pretty sure since I didn't sleep the night before and was having a rough time with the new year, it was warranted to be okay to take it).  When I woke up, I immediately went to go work out--I still have 20 pounds to lose of the baby weight.  Plus our counselor thinks that if I don't want to go on a drug like Lexipro or stay on the Xanax (which I don't), I have to find an outlet for my anger and sadness.  So, off to exercise I went--I hate feeling like I can't get out of bed.  I just want to lay there and think of what I should be doing right now, instead of what reality has brought me.  I have to say I'm proud of the fact that I got up and exercised for 30 minutes (20 minutes Fitness 360 and 10 minute of Fitness 360 yoga), and that afterward I felt a little more normal.  If only I can do this every morning before entering the world!  Work has me extremely anxious right now--there's lot of issues going on (that were happening before my son died) that when you have an insensitive supervisor (i'm a high school physical science teacher), who doesn't get that I wasn't home for 2 1/2 weeks eating chips and shopping and relaxing.  Harassment would be the best would I can use to describe his attitude toward me.  And unfortunately, where I would have just smiled and dealt with him as best I could till June, I don't have that care in me anymore to make him happy.  He and I had a conference within my first week returning...but more on that another day.

Anyway, after I was done exercising, Mario and I had to get ready and go pick up my daughters from his parents house (they wanted to have them for a sleepover New Year's Eve, which was great for them, to be spoiled and have fun with their grandparents).  Plus he and I were supposed to go to our friends' house, but with Mario being sick, and me being an emotional mess , I didn't think it would be a great idea.

People on the beach watching

As I was getting ready, I was thinking about what we could do for New Year's Day, without spending tons of money--like going to Longwood Gardens (but with Mario being sick I didn't think being around pollen would help!) and going to the aquarium was expensive for the 4 of us to go.  So I had a brainstorm, and when I looked it up, it seemed to be a great idea!  Ocean City, NJ is our go to vacation spot.  We can go there for day trips, weekend trips, overnight trips, or week long vacations.  They have a celebration called "First Night" which culminates with fireworks on the beach at midnight to ring in the New Year.  The next day, its a shopping extravaganza, a 5K run on the beach, and the "1st day at the beach" where people gather in silly costumes, and take their first dip of the year into the Atlantic.  I brought the idea up to Mario, and while he still felt crappy, he was okay with it.  So we went to pick up the girls, and presented the idea to his parents, to see if they wanted to go with us.  We asked my sister and law and her boyfriend too.  But all politely declined.  

People getting ready to swim!

That was okay--we piled into the van, and off we went.  We arrived in Ocean City around 12, and set out to find a parking spot.  Ocean City was crazy! It was full of people, parking lots were full, and the roads were still covered in snow so street parking was tough.  We went to a parking we were familar with that was near the boardwalk, the bathrooms and our pizza stop.  And what do you know...we found a spot right away!  Normally this erupts into fighting and yelling...instead we were happy and smiling--go figure!

So we went up the boardwalk, and my girls saw snow on the beach for the first time.  They were so confused!  I'll post pictures.  It is surreal seeing snow on the beach, but so unique too.  We sat down in our favorite pizza place, Mack and Manco's, and ordered a large cheese pie, and 2 slices of white for my oldest, with 3 birch beers and 1 lemonade.  While this is our usual when we go to the beach in the summer, to do it New Year's Day was sweet, and nice, and gave the negative view I had for 2011 a bit of a positive spin.  Maybe life can go back to normal after all.  When we were eating, my husband's phone rang, and it was his mom--they had decided to come after all!  We laughed--we knew she couldn't stay away.  But she and my father in law were just walking the boards.  We could catch up with them later.
We finished up lunch, with pregnant women and infants in strollers walking around with  no break downs.  Then we walked on the beach, and while it was a bit nippy, we found a spot to observe the people jumping in the water at 2pm, and waited.  We saw dogs, my girls ran and played in the sand/ snow.  We laughed at costumes, and shook our heads at the girls and guys walking around in just their swimsuits (keep in mind it was about 48 degrees F yesterday, with a slight breeze).  And then, the countdown started, and a noise signaled for everyone to jump in (I think it was a noise, like a horn, but I'm not sure)...and right away you heard squeals and squeaks and yelps as people hit the cold water.  It was amusing!!  As we walked away, my oldest told me she wanted to do that one year, and so did my youngest.  I told them fine, I'll be waiting with the towels on the beach.  We went and got my oldest funnel cake, and my youngest asked for cotton candy (which they didn't have), so she settled for gummi worms instead from Shrivers.
As we walked back to the car, I reflected as to what a great tradition we started.  Take a great summertime tradition, but start it on the first day of the New Year.  There was a feeling of contentment that I felt, of reassurance, that life isn't all sad, going through our family's traditions of the Ocean City boardwalk.  And while my little boy won't be joining us next summer, there was a part of me that knew he was the reason we started the new tradition this year, so that in the summer maybe I won't be as upset.
Here's to new traditions in this new year!