Dear Robbie,
Its been nine months since you grew your angel wings.  Nine very long months, but yet it seems like an eternity has gone by since I last felt you kick and  punch me.  As your daddy says, it seems like we've been without you so much longer.
I am constantly thinking about what we were doing last year at this time.  And I remember the terrible morning sickness.  Lying in your T.T.'s pool, in an inflatable donut, just waiting for the nausea to pass.  I remember going shopping with your aunt because I needed maternity clothes, and some flexible summer stuff, since you were growing so much.  I would give anything to have that time back.  A year ago we also saw your heartbeat for the first time.  That little flicker...so much I want to say, but I just don't have enough words.
I am so tempted to let my mind wander to the "what should we be doing"...to think of the 4-5 month old baby you would be.  What milestones you would be reaching.  But this only serves to make me more depressed and sad and angry.  I can hope for that, but I know in reality, my two boys are angels watching over us.  You are in a place where the roads are paved with gold (your sister E told me that this week--she learned in in vacation bible school).  Your sisters also accepted Jesus into their hearts this week, and one thing they know is that now they will be able to see you and Rango again.  And they are excited about meeting the two of you.
But Robbie, I miss you so much.  But I know (on my better days) that you were so sick, and God took you home so He could take care of you.  Its not that I wasn't going to be a good mommy, or your daddy wasn't going to love you and cuddle you.  It was that He could give you what you need.  And I know that you are healthy running around in Heaven, sitting on everyone's laps that will read to you.  I hope your great grandparents, and all of our family who is already in Heaven, are telling you stories all about me and your dad.
We miss you, and know that in the nine months since you left us, we haven't forgotten you, and while we are moving on in our lives here, you will never be replaced.  You will always have a piece of my heart, just as your sisters and Rango have.
I love you my first son...Behave until I get to see you!
Love
Mommy